Worry of rejection is one of the
widest things that keeps us back in living, but peculiarly in
relationships. The irony nonetheless is that rejection is actually
preferable to indifference, and that the effect will only be the same
as if we were to avoid ever putting ourselves on the line in the
first place.
For instance the most common time
when most of us are afraid of rejection is when we are thinking about
asking someone out. If we are so afraid of rejection that we never
approach or ask that person, then this will mean that there is a
assurance we wo n't end up dating them which is no dissimilar from
what would bechance if we were to be rejected. At the same time
though, if we at least ask and at least approach the person we are
interesting then we have a possibility of getting the positive
response that we want. At the same time if we try and fail then we
will still have the power to move on and to bookend the situation
rather than just wondering what might bechance. At the same time you
increase your opportunities by putting your quality of life on the
line thus demonstrating both vulnerability and courage, and you also
learn from the experience either way. There is every reason then to
try and to take a chance regardless of what you think the outcome is,
and yet so many of us stay stock still in inactivity as a consequence
of fear.
To get over this is simply a
matter of learning to put your wellbeing out there more, and learning
to get over societal inhibitions which can be attained by putting
yourself in awkward situations and learning that they 're not that
bad, or by using CBT to change the way they think about things.
Tell yourself it's a learning curb
and that it does n't matter. We do n't grow as a result of success,
we grow as a result of failure. Rejection only makes us stronger.
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